Personal

Decisions

The right decision is often the one you make.

When questions linger, they get heavier over time. When I talk about writing a book with aspiring authors, I share how a sense of paralysis occurs. Whether it’s from the writing or publishing process, this mental jam is not from a lack of options, but instead, so many. While it’s important to understand options, the key to momentum is to simply make each decision.

This is not as easy as it sounds. No matter how big or small the decision might be, the fear of getting it wrong stands in the way. Fortunately, while life or death decisions do occur, most of the time, a wrong decision only requires extra resources to make it right. Bad decisions add up, but if it’s just one decision that’s part of a longer sequence, even slight missteps can still move us closer to where we want to be.

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What decision is holding you back?

The decision I’m wrestling with, is if I should continue with my weekly writings. I’m so thankful for the reading room that is Roasted Reflections. It’s been a privilege and a blessing, but I’ve made sacrifices to ship this art every week for almost three years. I hinted at this in Recursion, but with the end of 2023 in sight, it’s time to decide if/how I should continue with this ambitious cadence.

Perhaps I’ve written what needs to be said, at least for now? Would these jolts of energy be missed if they were gone? Writing helps us understand our thoughts, so it’s nice to know if I do turn down the volume, the Roasted Reflections library isn’t going anywhere. I could still occasionally add fresh writings and we’ll stay connected with new episodes of You Don’t Need This Podcast brewing every week. What could I do with the extra bandwidth? Hmm…

I think it’s time. I’ll make this decision here and now.

The next four months (17 weeks) will be sequenced to say farewell to my weekly writings at the end of 2023. I’m so thankful for this remarkable ride we’ve shared together. Every writing will continue to be pure human, thoughtfully crafted, and brewed to keep us building. This will be an emotional process, but we are one my friends. People like us, do things like this, so cheers to all that is next.

By Ben McDougal, ago

Goodnight Moon

I crashed my first star party!

Most people have never heard of a star party, so let me set the scene. The Iowa Star Party is a weekend gathering of people all curious about the cosmos. Dark skies improve long range visibility, so to avoid light pollution, the middle of nowhere is ideal. As I arrived to the Whiterock Conservancy Star Field, there were different camp sites lined up, each with 1-3 telescopes setup. The astronomy equipment ranged from homemade to expensive and I enjoyed learning more about astrophotography. It was nice having a friendly host (Cheers Sinclair!) who had our camp on point, excellent equipment, and knew how to effectively lock into endless celestial objects. During the afternoon, you could tell everyone was just waiting for the evening sky to roll around. We sipped on some brews, went on a hike, listened to a talk from an astronomy professor, won the raffle prize, and then the heavenly show began!

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Welcome back to school! This week’s episode of You Don’t Need This Podcast features a caffeinated conversation with a special guest who spent 20 years in the classroom and is now redefining retirement. Enjoy!

Our first stop was a setting crescent moon. It’s hard to align a smartphone’s three lens camera into the sensitive eye piece of a telescope, but it’s not impossible. Objects are a kabillion miles away and everything is always moving so the photos aren’t great, but I enjoy trying to trap time in creative ways. I also captured nightlapse footage and while it may be amateur hour, my short highlight video is entertaining and it leads me to my first observation. Different people enjoy the moment in different ways, but when content creation is habitual, extending an experience becomes an option. Capturing those photos/video is required, but the extra effort shines through a willingness to review, edit, and stitch things together so it can be enjoyed and not just lost in a mountain of media.

My second observation is that we are all weird. Not an alienating type of weird, but a weird that challenged the status quo and what it means to be normal. Normal is boring and as I listened to the experience and passion of veteran star gazers, I’m reminded how easy it is to find a tribe of people who care about almost anything. This level of nerdery is inspiring and can be found no matter the focus, so never stop exploring.

The third observation is through the lens of pure wonder. It’s hard not to be astonished by countless stars surrounding you. I’ve enjoyed many cosmic experiences, such as this trip to Lowell Observatory in Arizona, but I had never felt the spherical movement in our night’s sky or seen the nebulosity of our Milky Way. Along with staring up into the seemingly infinite universe, looking through a telescope never got old. I saw Saturn’s rings, multiple moons and colored bands of Jupiter, meteors, satellite trains, binary stars, globular clusters like M13, and distance galaxies that blur like eraser marks on speckled black paper.

I thought I’d feel more spiritual throughout the evening’s exploration, but it was more fun, relaxing, creative, and scientific. While I have more thoughts on many fronts and I look forward to doing this again, my last observation is more of a hypothesis. Space is for everyone and I believe almost anyone would enjoy an experience like this.

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Forget the social media facade that is Threads. My first BlueSky post (web3) landed while I was at this star party, right before we crashed at 3AM.

By Ben McDougal, ago

Blocked

“How do you write every week for three years?”

Endless community-driven experiences, the privilege of time, building into connecting things I care about, metrics beyond money, publishing YDNTB, staying curious, finding comfort in uncertainty, and an efficiency that comes with consistency helps me continue to articulate written relics I’ll always be proud of.

Writing has become a part of my practice, but it’s not easy and never will be. Life is beautifully busy and what happens when there’s seemingly nothing to write about?

Can I call it writer’s block and hope nobody cares when Roasted Reflections doesn’t land in their inbox on Wednesday? No. Writer’s block is an illusion. An excuse not to ship. This paralysis is a symptom of prioritization within our practice.

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Don’t wait for inspiration.
Let the work inspire you.

Whether you listen to yourself in private (journalling) or share your heart in public, when you know you’re going to get it done, you become more consciously introspective. You stay more in-tune with what needs to be synthesized, while recursion and the indexing effect helps sustain a healthy obsession. Even when the moment’s thesis is not obvious, you’re strong enough to explore what needs to be said. This becomes a habit that invites anyone to reach higher without fearing the generous act of making a ruckus by shipping the art.

By Ben McDougal, ago

Uncertainty

Comfort in the unknown is uncommon.

We’ve all seen Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs and the desire for reliable outcomes feels prehistoric. Like a lingering decision that still needs an answer, uncertainty feels heavy when you’re not used to the mental weight.

This makes it valuable to juggle a little uncertainty. Start with small things that don’t matter. For instance, let the chef select your dinner or try a new way to stand out at that next community event. As you learn to feel what it’s like to be comfortable in the uncomfortable, you’ll be more at ease when important uncertainties emerge.

What’s the point of such preparation? The freedom to build your own reality requires sacrifice and the sense of certainty can hold us back from where we want to be.

This sounds dramatic, but when it comes to our work, certainty is often an illusion contrived by the industrial age. A “safe” position in the factory is one decision away from a broken promise. The factory worker’s willingness to play it safe may extend a sense of temporary security, but this is a choice that makes you easy to replace with cheaper labor, faster tools, and advancing technology.

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Life is united by uncertainty.
What a gift we all share together.

Those who want to be indispensable transcend their own comfort zone. This doesn’t mean irrational decisions loaded with risk. This mindset is a form of contentment without being complacent. It’s gratitude and not taking our time for granted. It’s inviting fresh opportunities and coordinating momentum, even when dancing with the unknown is required. As we tune into the right rhythm by sequencing different steps, more complex moves can be introduced and before you know it, you’re dancing with the stars.

By Ben McDougal, ago

Atmospheric

“How’s the weather?”

Who cares! Why do we talk about the weather? When there’s nothing else, the weather offers an early bond between strangers. This is because everyone has experience, and can therefore relate to different atmospheric conditions.

The weather is always changing and may be one of the easiest forms of small talk, but it’s just so boring. We can’t change it, so what does it matter? If you’re catching up with someone you already know, talk of the weather is even more pointless! Besides meaningful topics like climate change, the danger of severe weather, and the impact our environment has on shared activities, I propose we skip all the weather talk.

Next time you’re asked about the weather, breeze past the status quo. Make it rain with thoughtful questions to forecast more compelling bonds that last.

By Ben McDougal, ago