Brewed From Within

Listen

Listening is louder than it sounds.

The more obsessed, the more vociferous we get. Idea machines must be willing to share compelling stories, but listening is part of any transmission. This is obvious, but with precious airtime up for grabs and knowing so much about our own interests, listening can devolve into feeling like a required distraction.

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Hearing is passive.
Listening is active.

As we guide people through the layers of understanding, active listening forms a bond much faster than forcing ourselves to be heard. The fear of not having time to deliver our message will linger, but when we truly tune into what another person is saying, it shows we care. Active listening also helps us better harmonize our thoughts within the moment and counters the common mistake of overloading others with too much numbing details all at once. Knowing each conversation is part of a broader relationship journey, good listeners are almost always given a chance to make a bigger impact.

Ready for an experiment? The next time you meet someone new, embrace your inner scientist. Set your introverted/extroverted mindset aside and focus your attention on asking as many thoughtful questions as you can. The less you talk, the better. This will feel awkward if you just fire question after question, so be concise with each response, then return to thoughtful questions for a more natural interaction. Consider expanding this social experiment by purposely doing this throughout an entire networking event. Remember who you talked with and track how the listening-focused conversations evolve. Over time, how do these relationships compare with others where you’ve been less intent on listening?

Here are tactics to support your listening practice:

  • Center your internal attention.
  • Stay engaged with eye contact.
  • Use jarring questions to dodge small talk.
  • Don’t interrupt or jump to conclusions.
  • Occasionally paraphrase what was said.
  • Avoid the urge to make it about you.
  • Ask curious questions to go deeper.
  • Use non-verbal cues to express attention.
  • Record and share a few key takeaways.
  • Exit gracefully, without a sense of rush.
  • Follow up with one more question.
  • Ask about progress next time you meet.

This type of active listening will not only extend your ability to hear. It will also make your responses more in-tune with what others are thinking versus always trying to prove your point. Selflessness may keep a conversation from landing exactly where we want in that moment, but as we move from one topic to the next, we learn how others work.

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Listening within a support network ignites optimism, connection, and motivation. A healthy balance involves listening to challenge networks, which keeps us intellectually humble and rooted in reality.

When done well, an unspoken bond is formed. This synchronization curates future conversations that are enforced by shared enthusiasm.

Brewed From Within
#34 📖 Leadership

By Ben McDougal, ago

Linchpin

We are often told that being extraordinary makes us special. We each write our own story in life, but as Neil deGrasse Tyson suggests, perhaps the sameness of our cosmic composition is what makes each of us fundamentally special from beginning to end. This eliminates the need for permission and actually invites us all to be remarkable.

The factory, which can be thought of as any existing organization with established systems, relies on profit margins and replaceable cogs that follow instructions to keep the vast machine churning. The factory was designed to maximize productivity during the Industrial Age, but in our connected era, factories are fading. Gone are the days of clocking in on time and keeping your head down just long enough to climb a ladder built to resist change. The factory worker’s willingness to play it safe may extend a sense of security, but this choice makes you easy to replace with cheaper labor, faster tools, and advancing technology.

In 2010, Seth Godin gave those who choose to be indispensable a name: linchpins. Linchpins are artists who go beyond mediocre. Linchpins solve interesting problems and make judgement calls without a map. They welcome weird. They are scientists who stay curious. They are generous and passionate about the art of connection. Through an inclusive, positive-sum lens, linchpins lead and let others lead without seeking credit. They are fearless in that they are unafraid of things they don’t need to be afraid of. Linchpins leave resumes behind by curating a body of work that transcends time. They keep building at the speed of trust and relentlessly #GiveFirst, knowing that accelerating others generates unmatched energy.

Cogs in a machine are replaceable and therefore can be paid less. When you are a linchpin, you leverage your own superpowers and get rewarded for creative expressions that are rooted in lasting purpose. The skills of a linchpin are hard to quantify with traditional metrics, but a willingness to bring your true genius to work is an open invitation. Over time, the linchpin’s art becomes meaningful to many, which makes work less about trading time for money. This also brews a centered state of indispensability, where nobody can compete with being you.

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“Leaders don’t get a map

or a set of rules. Living life

without a map requires a

different attitude. It requires

you to be a linchpin.” –Seth Godin

If indispensability is accessible to anyone, why doesn’t everyone accept the invitation to be wonderfully weird?

One primal reason is the indoctrination of an education system that was designed to produce factory workers. From an early age, we are brainwashed to pursue perfection, to color within the lines, to follow instructions, to care what others think, and to define success by worldly consumption.

Fortunately, progressive teachers are activating modern students to go beyond the system. Instead of molding obedient factory workers who hope to be taken care of by factories built on promises of the past, we can teach people to take initiative. To honestly assess Playforce Principles. To invite doubt and to solve interesting problems while leading with reverse charisma and confident humility.

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What makes you indispensable?

Whether fueling innovative action as an intrapreneur, diversifying your career portfolio with an inventive side hustle, or building as an entrepreneur, we may only live once, and life is too short not to enjoy your work.

Brewed From Within
#38 📖 Leadership

By Ben McDougal, ago

Fructifying Fortitude

Watching toddlers learn to walk is adorable. This instinctive right of passage reminds us that fresh motivation may be needed when progress stalls.

At first, early moves feel natural, and then crawling did the job. As children see what’s possible, expectations rise and success begins to feel inevitable. If progress stalls, parental motivation can lose its luster and concern sets in. But what if the breakthrough simply awaits fresh encouragement?

As new motivation is introduced, even when it’s unplanned, progress proceeds almost all at once. We scramble for the camera and those precious first steps are beloved by all. More practice is still needed, but this achievement renews momentum that keeps little ones moving upright and forward.

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For parents smiling as they read this, know that Pure Wonder, Wayfinders, Winding Whys, Training Wheels, Playforce, Santa is Real, and many timeless episodes from You Don’t Need This Podcast are energizing extensions on this topic!

As we build into new quests, our dance with innovation may also require shifting gears. Next time an engine stalls, step back to consider an alternate angle, talk to peers with different perspectives, take time away, or show up unannounced to adapt and get back on track.

Brewed From Within
📖 Entrepreneurship

By Ben McDougal, ago

Shifting Gears

Imagine the howl of a distant motorcycle bolting through the night. Hear the speed and wait for that clutch to drop, knowing more power awaits.

The first gear is dedicated to initiating motion within an engine. It won’t get you far, but as the red line wraps, a shift brings you into the next gear that builds on the momentum. As that next gear tops out, yet another shifts moves you farther, with higher gears that bring you to full speed.

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After pushing a motorcycle to 150mph, twas time to sell that bullet on wheels. A face full of wind is still invigorating, but a convertible will now suffice.

Any journey is a dance, but reaching your destination requires an ability to temporarily lose power in exchange for more lasting capacity. Whether it’s personal or in business, recognizing a limit prompts a well-timed shift in gears to keep moving forward.

Brewed From Within
📖 Entrepreneurship

By Ben McDougal, ago

Anxiety

The mind is divine. It gives us superpowers, and the dots we electrochemically connect make us human. Such capacity allows us to achieve extraordinary things. At the same time, this mysterious grey matter can also hold us back and even cause havoc.

Anxiety is assuming failure in advance. As a mental cousin to fear, anticipation, worrying, and perhaps even desire, anxiety is like an unspoken agreement you make with yourself to be unhappy until you get what you want.This exhausting emotion is all in your head, yet the way anxiety affects your body is absolutely real.

For those who pursue greatness, the more we try to achieve, the tighter we wind the strings of life. When harnessed, this fuels strength, creativity, grit, and persistence. As the tension tightens, however, something is bound to break. Healthy habits and being mindful of your personal bandwidth reduces the frequency and severity of such breakdowns, but with the relentless pressure from never-ending progress, it seems impossible to completely avoid disquiet.

The most common way we attempt to manage such angst is to stop the pain by seeking reassurance. The nourishment of overthinking every scenario in an unknown future may satisfy the moment, but scratching this itch usually makes things worse. Even if we answer every possible question, the willingness to indulge the worry sets a precedent that keeps you coming back to what can become an endless loop.

An alternate approach is to acknowledge the suffering. Don’t run from it. Appreciate the relentless internal narrative you’re dealing with. Breathe. Be thankful for having something you care this much about. Find peace in knowing you’ve done your best to tip odds in your favor, but invite doubt and welcome an opportunity to be wrong. The anxiety is here and it’s dramatic, but it’s also normal. Let thoughts float by, focus your attention on what’s good, and allow time to heal the pain. Yes, this is like letting a forest fire burn without soothing it with water. It will get wild at first, but it eventually burns itself out. The scorched land is then ripe for renewal and less likely to burn again.

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Accepting that anxiety is inevitable

may be a secret to finding equanimity.

By acknowledging anxiety, clarifying awareness helps us understand, even appreciate, the energy. This breaks the cycle and reduces the frequency of such misery. Courage over fear also adds an eagerness to lean on support systems, confirms confidence in how the pain will pass, and allows the mind to stay centered with less climactic swings.

Brewed From Within
#96 📖 Life & Happiness

By Ben McDougal, ago