Complacency

Gimmies

Golf is a walk in the park with a small objective. If gimmies are illegal, why are conceded putts common?

What’s the harm in an unquestioned finish? Does picking up that “unmissable” putt really save much time? There are unspoken social factors at play, but so few people are great at golf. Why not relish a satisfying sound of that golf ball dropping into the tiny cup?

Extra Shot

May your feet stay in the fairway.

There’s no harm in keeping things casual to share time however you want, but tacit assumptions do leave room for misunderstandings. The truth is we all give gimmies to be given a break on putts we might miss ourselves.

When we keep score, see how it feels to play without gimmies. Appreciate the missed putts and count those extra strokes. The unequivocal finish feels good and builds confidence for when gifts aren’t up for grabs.

Brewed From Within
#110 📖 Life & Happiness

BONUS CONTEXT
Along with enjoying golf, I’ve created cinematic art at Glen Oaks Country Club since 2014. This calming header image was commissioned as a large-format canvas inside the clubhouse and is titled Lavender Finish.

By Ben McDougal, ago

Oversubscribed

It’s a go-go world of busy, busy, busy.

With days scheduled from start to finish, what time is left for random acts of conspicuous kindness, a bit of serendipity, or just saying yes to more adventure?

Coordination often requires thoughtful preparation. There is value in staying organized, but over-planning is a trap. The thirst for productivity has made busy feel likened to being successful. How often do we hear pride disguised as disgust when someone complains about the constrictions of their frantic calendar? Yes, prerequisites include hard work, a healthy obsession, and endless sequencing, but unique opportunities emerge when we’re not captive to a calendar.

Extra Shot
Planning is based on fear.
Doing is based on success.

Renting time can be lucrative, but there are ways to efficiently get things done without falling victim to a stacked routine of back-to-back everything.

Meetings led by talking heads, fracturing lunch affairs, and youth sports are all common versions of this trap. Each activity is cool, but when combined, your days become booked and you have something to do every night. To keep fluidity flowing, schedule fewer meetings next week but retain an eagerness to meet anytime. Instead of lunch, sip brews on either side of the day. Along with standard stuff, consider adventurous ways to share time. Audibles include parlaying a first meeting with an event, going for a stroll, and nature is always nice. This breaks routine. Conversations can be more provocative, as a shared encounter adds depth to any relationship. Lastly, appreciate limitless play, but organized sports will not define a child’s future. In fact, it more commonly limits the experiences a family enjoys together. The game resets at puberty, and at a societal level, playing sports as a career is a fantastic dream, but more often an accepted fallacy. Organized sports deliver camaraderie, fitness, teamwork, loyalty, problem-solving, business opportunities, and a competitive rush, but camps provide these benefits with less time and cost required.

Comfort without a plan leaves space for the unexpected. Things will not always work out, but if calendars remain a tool to keep our promises while staying quietly organized, complacency can be replaced with serendipity. If you feel oversubscribed, fly with fewer plans to let the voids of no agenda unravel a freedom to be your best.

Brewed From Within
#120 📖 Life & Happiness

By Ben McDougal, ago

Winterizing

As temperatures drop, those who live in seasonal climates prepare for winter. There are chores around the house and year-end tasks to wrap-up in business.

Transitional times can be uplifting, but the coming chill can also freeze progress. A temptation to coast makes it easy to push action into the future, but in doing so, a message that once united momentum can start to feel dispirited.

The team has earned a relaxing break, but what goals were not accomplished? Instead of putting progress on ice, reverse engineer past goals to determine whether a few final acts might move the needle. These sneaky achievements add closure and a positive boost for initiatives after the break.

Doing what’s easy delays hardship, but this resistance causes suffering. Winterize your world by attacking hardship. This demonstrates commitment, and the cold will feel more like an elegant refreshment that conditions invincible warmth.

Brewed From Within
#102 📖 Life & Happiness

By Ben McDougal, ago

Training Wheels

As a child, riding a bike was not as easy as it looked. Fortunately, early excitement was bolstered by the comfort of training wheels. These stabilizers provided balance but eventually became self-limiting. Removing training wheels took only a minute, but then fear set in. Staying upright, maintaining speed, avoiding obstacles, and falling without getting hurt felt overwhelming. Even with support from others, success seemed out of reach, until it clicked. Like magic, trepidation transformed into gliding independence.

Training wheels remind us that contentment can lead to complacency. Being content without complacency is a constant battle. One day you’re grateful for all that is, the next you’re feeling oddly stuck. Perhaps this is because the more complacent we become, the more rigid we get. This rigidity then devolves into a stronger fear of change. When the movement of change becomes associated with risk, it’s common to feel stuck, stagnant, or even irrelevant. When training wheels are holding you back, initiative sets you free and persistence keeps us moving. As movement separates from risk, we’re free to shift gears and ride toward next.

Brewed From Within
#100 📖 Life & Happiness

By Ben McDougal, ago